23 going on 24

i've been disturbed by these thoughts on near future and my future in general lately. all of a sudden all these pressure showed up out of nowhere. all the what ifs and wills are bursting here and there. today, i finally realized that i'm APPARENTLY stressed out and terrified about what will happen in the next few months.

on top of that, i have my thesis to handle and tackle in less than 7 weeks now.

gotta keep em faith.

i feel you feel me feel you?

though quiet times can be nice every now and then, silence can mislead you sometimes.
pfft, i hate it when that happens.

A Confession of A Not-So-Nice Girl.

Apparently:
I'm not as nice as I thought I am, and I actually CAN live with this fact.

Huff, nuff said!

when what you think isn't whats happening.

I am thinking to give my self a break. As in stop thinking the unnecessary. Control the mind.
I feel that I am a little bit too caught up with unnecessary shit recently. When I thought that I am not holding on to things, that is exactly what happens.

Lets back on focus. I have more important things to think and to deal with.

OKAY.
lets get on the RIDE.

How did I survived?

I just realized that I spent less time now with girl friends, in fact I just realized that..I don't have any. (Gasp!) I mean, I don't have a very close girl friend that I spent my days with and shop and gossip and whine about boys other than my old old friends from back home, and that is only through YM. Occasionally that is.

OMG.

What the fuck happened?
And how did I survived all these time?

Love is. I think.

It is only recently that I wonder and ponder, why I keep on doing what I am doing and think the way I think. Somewhere, at some point in my life, I have stopped wanting things so bad, I have stopped wanting to keep things and feelings in me. I realized that I am less flammable now.

Knowing that nothing lasts forever gives me a calm feeling somehow. I am no longer scared of being sad or happy. Wounds are bound to happen as happiness too. This weird feeling of lightness surrounds me, kind of scares me.

doesn't it scare you, the will is not as strong as it used to be?

Love is. I think.
Patient is my helper.

Gong Xi Fa Cai

I kinda like Chinese New Year in Singapore. No, not because the discounted items suddenly appear sporadically all over Orchard. Eew, it's so not because of that. It's because CNY here reminds me of Bandung and Jakarta during Idul Fitri. Everyone is at home spending time with their families for once and taking some time off shopping (duh,like it's about time!). And for once Singapore felt like a more reasonable place to live.

NOT that I hate Singapore. :P

JC and Matt are heading out for Bintan this afternoon leaving me behind with my 'i'm-not-pregnant' cramps (thanks B for pointing that out, that's a way to say it :) ).

It's 8 52 PM and I've been successfully unproductive but very much happy for unexplainable reason.

So, er.. though I dont exactly celebrate CNY. It wouldn't hurt to say Happy Lunar Year wouldn't it? Tee-hee.